I’ve written tons of songs over the past 20 years – some just for myself and many others for the various bands I’ve played in: Genuine Fakers, Old Boys & The Dirty Birds, General Musings, Emperor Koko, Bayla-Bayla and now Sutra. I’ve been the lead vocalist at times, I’ve played guitar and I now play synth. I even sang alongside my younger sister Rebecca in Bayla-Bayla.
Sutra is currently still active as a band, and as I write this (September 2018), we have plans to gig again around London and the surrounding area. Realistically, probably not until 2019 – babies, academic, life and work commitments have forced us into hiatus for a year now. We’ve also got four new tracks recorded from studio sessions which will hopefully soon be mastered and put up on Spotify here.
LISTEN HERE: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0hDfY8wdnKLR6D3SApwkqz?si=PVdB-v5vQSCCv3sdqBBlrQ
I thought I’d share a selection of some of the lyrics I’d crafted over that time, as much of what I’ve written has been directly influenced by philosophy – a LOT of Freudian and Lacanian psychoanalysis, as that’s what captured my heart at university. But there’s also plenty of Nietzsche, Marx, Taoism, existentialism and many other areas of metaphysical inquiry. Plus, as is often the case, there are plenty of songs about love, meaning and hardships, which are extrinsically linked to my academic and cultural experiences. Oh, and some are just plain silly or a bit shit – but so is life. And we wouldn’t have it any other way! I’ve put links to the songs where possible – I haven’t actually recorded too much properly in studios over the years, so some are sketchy live recordings. But thanks for reading (and listening). And please do one more thing for me – never stop watching live music; it feeds the soul and helps to keep us Dionysian. And we all need a bit of Dionysus in us every now and then.
“Without music, life would be a mistake.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche
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GENUINE FAKERS (approx 1999-2003)
Impossible Love
This song is entirely creditable to the work of Freud and Lacan and their psychoanalysis. The impossible love spoken of is essentially the infantile realisation that they are no longer part of one whole entity with their mother and actually belong to a wider world; the impossibility is the desire to return to the state where all your needs were catered to by your mother figure. It is the realisation that every subsequent relationship is influenced by an unquenchable longing for something more – peace, joy and an end to desire.
What I need from you
You could never be
What I seek in you
You won’t see in me
We all walk alone
Blinded by our fate
Trying to find some peace
In an earlier state
*********
Impossible love
Yeah
Impossible love
Woah
Can never be enough
Impossible
**********
I can’t look in your eyes
It’s unfair
It’s when I realise
The despair
I know you cannot be
The one that I desire
So let the void destroy me
Wallow in the mire
*********
Impossible love
Yeah
Impossible love
Woah
Can never be enough
Impossible
I Want The Whole World
Another song heavily influenced by psychoanalytic theory – this time Freud’s Eros and Thanatos life and death drives are referenced heavily. And there are similar themes to Impossible Love – wanting the whole world would be that
Freudian notion of symbolically killing the father to win the mother and recapture that lost wholeness I previously spoke of.
Here now we are
All lined in a row
The battles we fight
And the ones you don’t know
Split from the core
And ready to fight
The powers of love and death unite
I want the whole world
*********
Consuming the art
The doctrine we follow
The pain we seek
The fear we swallow
Open your eyes
It’s easy you know
And in this disguise division will grow
********************
OLD BOYS & THE DIRTY BIRDS (approx 2008-2010)
History
You call me a dinosaur
I wanted your love but you wanted more
Yeah you wanted more
And how could I know that we’d never last
But that’s all extinct, yeah it’s all in the past
Well, it’s gone too fast
*********
You said your life it was an open book
So how come I never got a look?
Yeah my world you shook
William conquered like you conquered me
But it’s time to forget now that I’m history
Yeah I’m history
*********
What does it take to past your test?
I never could settle for second best
What about all our memories?
What about history?
*********
It don’t stop
It don’t stop
It don’t stop
It don’t stop
********************
GENERAL MUSINGS (approx 2010-11)
In Your Arms
This song tells the story of how the three of us in the band (and a few more boldus besides) lived our lives at the time – playing music, boozing and having lots of fun. This was a golden era for glorious band vibes – we used to practice several times a week and pretty much always ended the night in the pub doing naughty things. The areas were New Cross and Deptford in south east London – and the pubs of choice were The Royal Albert, The New Cross Inn and The Amersham Arms.
Roll up roll up the show’s in town
Get your coats on and put your glasses down
Cans of red stripe and JC’s lines
Get your hands off those sealife finds
*********
You have got to believe
This is not some sweet dream
All I know is that we’re on to a winner
You can see for yourself
This is like the top shelf
Take your pick and have your wicked way with her
*********
Roll up roll up the show’s in town
You’ll have more fun with your trousers down
Goldsmith’s finest and JC’s lines
Rock til your ears bleed and your eyes go blind
*********
You have got to believe
This is not some sweet dream
All I know is that we’re on to a winner
You can see for yourself
This is like the top shelf
Take your pick and have your wicked way with her
*********
Home… where we’ll go
But you know you’ll never be satisfied
Home… where we’ll go
But you know you’ll never be satisfied
Bohemian Haphazardy
Another song written at the height of General Musings and the boldu crew’s booze-fuelled party days – living as close to the rockstar lifestyle as any person with jobs and morals can get. This was all about one night we went to proper dodgy boozer in Deptford and ended up doing questionable karaoke version of Bohemian Rhapsody in front of a pub of even more questionable punters.
Let the beads hang
And drape your colours from the wall
To make them feel small
A toothless grin
And a tonic and gin
Well it’s not our fault that we have to bolt this door
*********
With tribal marks
And soulless barks
I’m afraid that you’ve outstayed your welcome
Let’s get some air
Get out of there
Well you thought were right but this is the wrong one
*********
Where else can we go?
Because there’s no place like home
But it’s where we always roam
And we’re so predictable
********************
EMPEROR KOKO (approx 2011-2013)
Somewhere Under The Railway Arch
This song was all about the first rehearsal studio we practised at together – and the weird guy who ran it. He got away with selling cans of San Miguel without an alcohol licence by marketing them as Cadbury’s Freddo chocolate bars for £2 with a free can of lager. He called them Spanish Frogs! This is actually where the name SUTRA (the current band) came from – as three of us from Emperor Koko are members of Sutra (and another one from Genuine Fakers – my first band which was formed at school).
Step on in, through the mural on the wall
You’re a crazy brother but man I still love ya
Gimme two Spanish frogs, to get around the law
Tappin your feet to irregular beats since 1974
Oh, he laid every brick
Oh, it really makes you think
*********
He told me his name was Sue, and he said he loved the Clash
Schooled in the age of Jimmy Page, with a side of Johnny Cash
I said gimme two Spanish frogs, to get around the law
With his bare hands he built this land, from celing down to floor
Ooh, he laid every brick
Ooh, it really makes you think
Really makes you think
*********
Somewhere under the railway arch, hidden the east
There’s a guy who’s seen through the other side, and grappled with the beast
He’s got his demons, don’t we all, a real peculiar taste
But when he’s in his mecca well there’s nowhere better, in his rightful place
*********
Somewhere under the railway arch, hidden underground
There’s a guy getting high while the trains go by to an old familiar sound
A furry peach down at your feet, he’s there to meet and greet
It’s a musical palace and just like Alice, we’re in for a special treat
*********
It’s a hoooo-oo-oome
It’s a hoooo-oo-oome
It’s a hoooo-oo-oome
It’s a hoooo-oo-oome
Beneath The Surface (BTS)
For the ARMY members who might read this, in another lovely little coincidence between me and the Korean group, this song (which is based on the book Freakonomics) was always referred to as BTS by the Emperor Koko boys. And was easily our favourite. What can I say – we just love acronym titles! Which reminds me – in the General Musings days we had two songs called New One A and New One B. The latter was also an acronym title – NOB. Never grow up, people…
Bound to the ground tryin to make end’s meat, support a family
Stuck to the foot of a pyramid, tryin to scale the money tree
If you rub your eyes and realise there’s more to life than you see
Soldiers patrolling the streets for the hierarchy
*********
We beg, steal and borrow, to get ourselves ahead
I need to see an expert just to get me out the red
And if I knew that you were cheating me, I would’ve stayed in bed
Just give me sweet incentives instead
*********
You have got the information
And you have got control
I don’t care bout your reputation
I told you I’m sold
*********
Why don’t we delve a little deeper
Why don’t we open up your mind
Why don’t we scratch beneath the surface
You won’t believe what you may find
*********
Look beyond
Look beyond
Look beyond
Look beyond
The Island
I actually wrote this song when our current Prime Minister Teresa May was the Home Secretary and I was feeling aggrieved about changes to our immigration policy. Little did I know what nonsense was to come with Brexit! I hate to see such division in contemporary society – I obviously don’t know what it used to be like in generations before mine. But we need to foster and champion love, kindness and unity – help each other, look after each other and teach the next generation that they can turn things around.
Who left the door that door open
You can feel them crawling under your skin
They say that it’s broken
But that’s always how the riots begin
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say no
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say borders closed
*********
Keep the blue flag flying
300 million-acre private estate
Keep the new suits lying
And the needy parasitic away
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say no
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say borders closed
*********
Closed, oh, closed, Mother Teresa say no, no, no
Closed, oh, closed, Mother Teresa say no, no, no
*********
You feel a bit sceptic
You don’t wanna give the power away
It’s all a bit hectic
But don’t worry no one care’s about a thing you say
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say no
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say borders closed
*********
So we’re finally ostracised
Their happy with a lower-case E
And as the blue flag flies high
The island’s getting drowned by the sea
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say no
Mother Teresa gone keep em out, keep em out, Mother Teresa say borders closed
*********
Closed, oh, closed, Mother Teresa say no, no, no
Closed, oh, closed, Mother Teresa say no, no, no
*********
What makes you think that you would be welcome here
What makes you think that you won’t just disappear
What makes you think that you would be welcome here
What makes you think that you won’t just disappear
********************
BAYLA-BAYLA (approx 2013-14)
Delicate Fantasy
This was another nod to psychoanalysis – this time the notion of phantasy. It’s all about our unconscious sexual drives/libido and how this manifests itself in everything we do – not just sex acts. In psychoanalytic treatment, they try to convert unconscious phantasy into (sometimes difficult to deal with) conscious thought – so as to help allay suffering experienced by patients in various ways – again not just sexually (like, say, fetishes – which again, are not necessarily always linked to suffering, either). It’s also linked to defence mechanisms such as obsessive compulsive disorder – the idea that we endlessly repeat actions to maintain a semblance of control. This is something I’ve suffered with and continue to deal with every day in small ways – even just going over characters over and over again when I’m writing. I know what I’m doing and how silly it is, but I can’t stop myself. We are complex beings!
What are you trying to keep from me?
I’m just hoping for an answer
Assume your delicate fantasy
it’s just lies on lies on lies on…
See what you wanna see
Staring straight into the sun
Assume your delicate fantasy
Well you can pull the other one
*********
What does it take?
To explore a mind
All is at stake
The fate of mankind
And all these dire straits
They get left behind
But I won’t hesitate
Just don’t look into his eyes
*********
Who said it was okay to be
Jumping through circus hoops?
Assume your delicate fantasy
It’s just lies on lies on lies on…
See what you wanna see
But don’t get blinded by the glare
Assume your delicate fantasy
Momma told you not to stare
*********
What does it take?
To explore a mind
All is at stake
The fate of mankind
And all these dire straits
They get left behind
But I won’t hesitate
Just don’t look into his eyes
Just don’t look into his eyes
********************
SUTRA (approx 2014-present)
Mend
I can’t always be there when you fall
Acting like I always know it all
Sleeping like you never got a pill
Killing you that there’s no time to kill
*********
Fall
But we’ll forget it all
Your order’s getting tall
Forget about it all
You can never get it
Gonna get it, get it, somehow
*********
I want to mend your broken
Wings
I want to mend your broken
Wings
*********
Every tear that wells up in your eye
Every cloud that blackens up the sky
And every friend who never says goodbye
You wanna change but you don’t wanna try
*********
You can never get it
Gonna get it, get it, somehow
*********
I want to mend your broken
Wings
I want to mend your broken
Wings
Catcher
I wrote these lyrics after reading the book Catcher In The Rye by J. D. Salinger. I absolutely adored this coming-of-age novel – I found Holden Caulfield’s reckless abandon and aimless youthful nihilism captivating. I think we all feel, or have felt, like that character at points in our life; I believe those moments give us a good reference point for remembering why we enjoyed being young, but wouldn’t choose to go back there and do it again!
I’m an island, sinking slowly
No direction, and so lonely
What will I become? Falling off a cliff
Like a spinning top
Coming off the rails
And fumbling in the dark
*********
Here come old flat top
Groove up slowly to me
Fresh shirt and shoeshine
And a Harvard degree
I ain’t got no time for some two-bit phoney
I’ll take club soda with a shot of whisky
*********
Here come old flat top
Groove up slowly to me
Taking advantage of my generosity
I ain’t got no time for some two-bit phoney
The world don’t listen to them kids, them like me
*********
On a roll
But I got no direction
On my own
Just natural selection
On a roll
But I got no direction
On my own
Just natural selection
Rat With A Bone
This song is kind of like the musical and spiritual follow-up to The Island (from the Emperor Koko days) – at least that’s what myself and guitarist Jack always thought. It again references the UK’s troubled immigration policy – with the country now being led by Teresa May. I believe this island is for everyone – just like the rest of planet earth. And it saddens me that more people don’t see things that way.
This split isn’t good for me
You feel you don’t have a home
And I wanted was unity
She’s like a rat with a bone
*********
Paranoid
My time is up
Stuck in the void
I’m paranoid
My time is up
Stuck in the void
I’m giving up
*********
You tell them to leave this place
That it isn’t your home
And now we’re living in sheer disgrace
Just like the rat with his bone
*********
Paranoid
My time is up
Stuck in the void
I’m paranoid
My time is up
Stuck in the void
I’m giving up
*********
No place to go
Without a home
You’ll be the last to know
No place to go
Without a home
You’ll be the last to know
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And few more assorted pics. Thanks for reading!



It was a long read but let me tell you, it was worth it. Haven’t heard of them but they got nice lyrics.
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Cheers bud. That was something of a labour of love to be honest. And am opportunity to revisit some lovely memories
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